12 REASONS TO SHARE YOUR STORY
Wade Mullen has sensitively set out a list of common barriers that need to be overcome in order for a survivor to disclose their abuse. It can be found here: 12 Walls That Prevent Abuse Survivors From Ever Telling . The necessity of conquering such stress, risk and despair mean that false accusations are remarkably rare.
With such formidable obstacles to telling your story of suffering in a Christian context, what positive factors might persuade you to speak out nonetheless?
Here are twelve encouragements that may result in survivors expressing themselves at the right time, in a safe place and with the appropriate support lined up in advance.
1. Secrecy compounds the trauma of abuse, through isolation. Despite all the risks and costs, sharing your abuse story in a careful and controlled way may be the beginning of the end for your feelings of shame.
2. Exposing the deeds of darkness can allow redemptive light to flow in providing hope, help and healing for other victims who have been enslaved by their abuser’s dark shadow.
3. Many victims will not find the courage to come forward unless they are emboldened by others. This is acutely significant when the abuse is particularly grievous.
4. Even victims who do not disclose, themselves, will be vindicated and comforted by your survivor’s story.
5. No one knows the extent of an abuse scandal until all of the abuse has been disclosed. So, any sacrifice that facilitates this is to be prized and honoured. We may never find out the full dimensions of the iceberg, but we can register its apparent scope.
6. Discovering the extent of the abuse opens the door for appropriate earthly justice. Whether through secular or ecclesiastical courts, earthly justice helps to ensure that abusers are stopped in their tracks and are seen not to ‘get away with it’, demonstrating God’s equitable character to the world. It publicly vindicates victims and survivors and may establish the basis for their compensation. Earthly justice acts as a warning to other past, potential and active abusers. It also disciplines abusers so that they might repent and avoid future and final judgment.
7. Active and passive enablers of abuse can only be dealt with appropriately if their roles are first exposed.
8. Churches and Christian organizations will, at the very least, be given the chance to corporately repent of their failure. Don’t hold your breath and you’re not responsible for results.
9. Churches and Christian organizations will be encouraged to form healthier cultures.
10. Christian communities divided over whether someone was an abuser/enabler, or not, can be reunited by a clearer understanding of the width, length and depth of the abuse and the appropriate action being taken.
11. Christians can rebuild trust with the wider community when earthly justice is carried out and healthier cultures are formed that bear a true witness to God.
12. The Lord gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. (Isaiah 40:29)
